Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Life

I cannot believe how long it has been since I wrote in this blog. I just finished reading my last post and I'm smiling ear to ear. The theme of that entry will remain the same as this one: My daughter is amazing, and I am supremely blessed. If that is too "happy go lucky" for some of you to stomach, here's a little perspective. My life is not perfect. I have troubles and worries, problems and woes. I am in terrible debt from student loans. I live in a tiny apartment and can't foresee ever saving enough to move out. I have to work two jobs to support my family. I don't know when I'll be able to afford having more kids. Life is uncertain and troubling at times, but now let's go over what I just said with a positive attitude. 1) I am a college graduate and have learned invaluable life lessons. 2) I have a roof over my head. 3) I have a steady income. 4) I have a beautiful, happy, healthy daughter. We can choose to live our imperfect lives in a state of depression or with an abundance of gratitude. Which will you choose?

Since I last wrote in September, 2014 (wow!), Eliana was learning new words and growing into a rambunctious toddler. Now she's my tiny helper and new best friend. We talk ... all the time. Full on conversations. She makes me laugh more than my husband (hard to believe, I know) and she is a sweet joy in our home a great majority of the time. I guess you could say she's well into her "terrible twos," but each tantrum is a learning opportunity (for her and me) to understand her heightened emotional state more clearly. I think I'm doing a respectable job keeping the monster at bay. ;) Zach and I work hard on our consistent parenting in hopes of giving Eliana structure and discipline she can understand. Everyone we meet tells me we are doing a good job, so I'm grateful for that!

I'm still working from home most days of the week in order to be with Eliana (a blessing not lost on me). I go into the office once a week to meet with people while my mother watches Elle (another blessing not lost on me ... or my mother for that matter!) I recently started a second job at a local grocery store to save up some money. Living paycheck to paycheck was not my favorite thing, so here's to actually using that savings account that's been empty for years! I love my new job. I enjoy the work and I respect the people. Everyone from my coworkers to management is warm and friendly, and the store is productive and clean. I get to enthusiastically interact with customers every day and I think it's a perfect fit for me. Zach is doing a fantastic job picking up the slack at home while I'm gone. A nice perk is the special daddy/daughter time Eliana enjoys each night. We've got our little system, and it's working quite nicely. I had been praying about a way to increase our income without disrupting our family, so I believe this opportunity is a blessing from the Lord.

I'm excited about the new year. My mother bought me a day-by-day devotional I'm eager to begin. Spending quiet time in scripture is something that usually takes a back seat in my life, so I think this devotional will help with that. The last time I read through the Old Testament in a timely manner was with a Bible app on my phone, so I'll try any helpful tool I can get. Zach has been saying the Lord's Prayer with Eliana at bed time ever since she was a little baby, so now she's starting to repeat it with him. What a beautiful gift the word of God is to our children! I hope we keep up the good work and don't get lazy in that area of parenting.

Speaking of lazy parenting, however, I do NOT want to potty train my kid. Those who know me well know I don't like messes. And let's be honest ... even if you do the "3 day potty training," there will be messes. I know I'm doing a disservice to my very smart 2 year old by not at least TRYING to potty train her, but I'm waiting for the spirit to lead me, so to speak. ;) Rather, I'm waiting until I have at least 40 more Pinterest articles under my belt before I begin this mammoth task. If I were a more driven individual, I would absolutely start a "Potty Train My Kid, Please" business. I think it would make millions. There must be other moms out there who would love to pay someone to potty train their kid. I haven't even tried yet but the idea of beginning the process terrifies me. What if I do it wrong, and my child never learns? What if it takes too long and my lack of patience gives my child anxiety? They say the best method is to stay home for a week and hang out around potty, giving your child lots of juice and no pants. But my subconscious responds with, "...who wants to sit around a toilet all day? ... I need to go to work ... I need to leave the house ... I don't let Eliana drink juice ... what if Elle is too cold without pants on! Etc... etc... etc." You can see why I never get started.

Parenting is hard and seems to magnify all my craziness. But hey, what's life without a little crazy in it? There is never one way to do something, and children have survived long before Pinterest and WebMD. Every parenting style is different and each child is unique. I'm sure what I do with Eliana is wrong at times, but the general consensus is that she is smart, loving, and joyful. What more could I ask for? Zach and I must be doing something right. More specifically, we must have a merciful God who helps raise up our children despite our shortcomings. #amiright

Enjoy the New Year, everyone!

Xoxo, Liz